Guys, you know what should count as a cardio exercise? Soul crushing panic attacks.
There is NOTHING to get your heart rate up like suddenly feeling like your heart is going to explode out of your chest and that oh-holy-balls-im-going-to-die-here-in-an-empty-stairwell-and-my-corpse-will-be-eaten-by-spiders and then BAM you’re hyperventilating and crying on the floor and you’re not sure why but you’re pretty sure the entire planet is going to explode if you so much as move.
Seriously BPM’s THROUGH THE ROOF MOFOS!
It’s like spin class for the emotionally crippled and requires basically no equipment, just a brain that like to confuse a normal work out with being chased by a hoard of rapist bears with rusty spoons and judgement. So of course it’s all “SHIT SHIT MORE ADRENALIN!”
I don’t know why I even bother owning a gym membership. I should really just go jogging near things that scare me.
Like places with large numbers of small children, anywhere I may be expected to do math in front of a crowd or maybe be told I can only ever eat salad again. All of these things would have my heart rate resembling that of someone who is ACTUALLY doing physical activity.
But my favourite part of today was being told by my trainer (who I really do love, I just don’t think she fully understands what anxiety and depression can do to people who seem happy but are really freaking out all the damned time) that I should just ignore the little voice thats telling me I’m a massive failure at pretty much everything I do and I wanted to shout at her DONT YOU THINK IM TRYING. But that little voice was too busy pointing out that this panic attack was a perfect example of why I’m bad at everything.
That voice is a jerk.
I just realized that this isn’t funny at all and I’m sorry. But the good news is that all my favourite bloggers are just as crazy as I am. So… yay?
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6 Responses to Warning: This isn’t really all that funny… And I smell sort of bad.
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- @porterairlines sooo what happens if I miss my flight???
- @flyporter sooo what happens if I miss my flight??
- @JenbugTweets Im like 24% sure it's a nude of some chicks back. And it's terrifying.
People think that because you paste on a smile, appear to be competent and confident that you must be so. Having suffered from depression (but not anxiety), I heard people say to me all the time, “You’re the last person I would imagine” when I talked about my depression. The effort to keep smiling was EXHAUSTING!! Mental illness is an invisible wound, talking about it helps others understand what you’re going through. You’re no failure, tell that voice to shut the hell up.
I want to furiously hug the crap out of you.
Cause you are totally right.
It’s hard to do anything when having a panic attack. I can’t imagine trying to work out. It’s hard enough to breathe doing either anywho. My anxiety puts me in a constant state of looking excited about everything, but really I just run at higher speeds so I don’t notice how much everything freaks me the fuck out.
hmmm….. faster walking…. I may try this.
Okay the situation isn’t funny, but your way of explaining it TOTALLY is.
so…win?
heheh yay!!! I was trying to not scare anyone too badly.