Last Wednesday Manfriend asked me if I wanted to go to dinner with him to my favourite restaurant. I, being a total douche canoe, replied with a “I would love to but, baby, we broke”. I enjoy crushing hopes and dreams of others with my sense of misguided frugality.

So we decided that instead [...]

First off – I apologize for posting cat videos. I promised myself I would never do that. My only excuse is that the cat says Vagina about a thousand times and has its own private jet. I’m pretty much positive your cat doesn’t have a private jet.

Also – on Wednesday Manfriend asked me to [...]

Fuck the penguin. This Cat kicks the crap out of the penguin. Also – I think it’s voice is kind of sexy….

Maybe I should either drink more or less.

A Lion Riding a Manta Ray – UNQUESTIONABLY VAGINAL!

Guys – I want a pet penguin so bad right now. It has a back pack. A Tiny Penguin backpack. I want to kidnapp her.

I would obviously re name her Shenaynay and get her a monocle.

You’re Welcome.

This weekend I discovered that I’m highly allergic to all natural, organic bamboo face wipes from one of those fancy hippy stores that smell like patchoulie and armpit hair.

Okay thats not accurate, its a funky boutique store my friend works at but they’re still hippies. Just more of the “I grow my own vegetable [...]